It is crazy how time moves fast when things have been slow.
I love the SLOW
I forget how much things have changed through all of this. There is so much to process and yet so much growth.
I am learning that the body takes so much time to heal and at such a slow pace.
We do so much everyday. How do you take the time to thank your body.
As I am healing, I am learning how much my mind and body are healing together.
I have learned that my mind can easily let go and release the tension that eats away at my mental body. I have to train my physical body on how to hold and carry my mental body with ease. Flowing in a way to where it can relax and melt the stress that my mind has caused.
I can’t help but to be brought back to the feelings I feel daily.
tightness in the jaw, hips, neck, and back
I had to admit that I was carrying stress. Where does this everyday stress come from? I could easily say that it’s from my injury, but these are feeling in my body that I carry everyday, before the military.
I decided to go DEEPER……..
Childhood trauma shapes us as adults. The scars we carry are life long behavior patterns we practice everyday. Were not even aware of it most of the time.
This realization was very bittersweet. Finally I have a key to unlock and stop carrying myself this way. Stop the habitual pattern of the effects of this abuse.
Only did I know this was the beginning.
I am working on this awareness. Knowing your triggers help, but also really get to know yourself.
Going backwards into the past to give me what I needed from a compassionate and forgiving perspective, is so healing. Yet, my body still needs more time to unlearn this.
Always know that we deal with constant stress everyday and the healing is never really over or complete. I have a long way to go.
Whats the best way to start the release!
I decided as part of my 30th Birthday I would do a burn and release ceremony!
The idea was to write what I wanted to let go of on a slip of paper, and burn it to ashes. I chose all of the things that have been projected onto me, that I have been carrying since birth. Even when I couldn’t understand logically my body remembers the way I felt. I needed more love, forgiveness, and compassion for myself.
I wrote it all and watched it burn!
It felt so good to finally acknowledge all of my bullshit! To finally make a change.
Acknowledging your problems are just the first start.
The tough part is changing your actions. This takes a long time to accomplish and to break out of the mindsets that were instilled on you. Let me tell you the more you can liberate yourself and start to become your authentic self the better.
We all have to respect our own journeys. Give each other love, compassion, and strength along the way.